My Pen Is Mighty

You Can Call Me ‘Cookie’ Or ‘Peaches,’ But Not ‘Chocolate’

Using food as ‘verbal hugs’ is welcome within the Black community, but outsiders should tread lightly.

In the Black community, we sometimes use food — like this vanilla, caramel and chocolate layered dessert — as a stand-in for skin color. It’s only a problem if folk abuse the practice. Image: Getty

I grew up two houses down from a jolly little kid we all called “Sugarman.” Two of my mom’s best girlfriends were only known by the moniker “Cookie.” If someone ever referred to them by their real names, no one would know who you were talking about. And, in Nina Simone’s feminist anthem “Four Women,” the fourth woman, named “Peaches,” laments about how hard her life has been. In it, she explains that she’s bitter because her parents were former slaves. Yet, someone still cared enough to name her after the juiciest, most flavorful fruit in the orchard.

One of the most fascinating aspects about African-American culture is that it uses food as “verbal hugs,” a “sincere acknowledgment, said to make the person feel warm, loved, and honored.” That includes the aforementioned nicknames — others like “Peanut,” “Pudding,” and “Pumpkin” also come to mind — and vivid culinary descriptors that some experts say occasionally fetishize and objectify Black people.