Why Black People Don’t Congregate in the Break Room
Office politics take on a completely different meaning when you’re Black
This story was originally published through hello-collective.com, a Diversity, Equity & Inclusion consultancy based in NYC.
If you’re a Black millennial, you have likely experienced that feeling of relief and excitement when you see another Black person in the office or hired at your company. If you’re like me, you become instantly curious about who they are, what they are into, and hyped about the fact that another one of us has “made it.” There might also be a part of you that has to level out the joy inside as reality sets in.
You may have also found yourself having pure and candid conversations and shared laughter with fellow Black colleagues, and just when it is getting good, one of you will say, “Let us get back to work because there are too many of us around.” Then that fun social moment at work abruptly ends, and everyone goes back to being siloed. With all the positive internal feelings that we may possess, the “rules” of engagement in the office for Black people are different; therefore, we have no choice but to act accordingly.
When a marginalized group is not largely represented or actively included in a space, specifically professional spaces, there is constantly a feeling of singleness, loneliness, and isolation that lingers. Marginalized folks will feel the pressure that comes with their presence and what that represents for them professionally because of the subconscious need to represent their race, and sometimes gender, in the best light. This pressure influences the way an employee not only performs in their work but how they interact in those spaces.
So, why don’t Black people congregate in the break room? Here’s an extremely consolidated list of reasons why.
1. We are ensuring that our White colleagues do not feel threatened by how we occupy the space.
We have to make sure we don’t laugh too loud or slip and get too colloquial with each other because it may make others uncomfortable. We know that historically (and even recently), Black people in numbers have made our White counterparts feel threatened, unsafe, suspicious.
In an effort to avoid perpetuating harmful labels on ourselves and being seen as unprofessional, Black people in the office may instead avoid each other’s company and opt to gather outside of the office and away from potentially judgmental eyes.
2. We don’t want it to seem that we are not focused on our own duties.
It is quite astonishing how the idea of camaraderie among Black folks at work would make people think that our actual work is going to get neglected. To combat myths of Black laziness and also to compete in a world designed against us, many of us have been conditioned to work twice as hard as our White counterparts. We don’t want to fuel any ideas
Of course, the idea of camaraderie isn’t challenged when we have to subscribe to the overarching social politics in the office. When a company wants to put together an employee research group (or ERG), a diversity task force, or a Black History Month committee, they more than welcome the congregation of their Black employees. Black people finding ways to connect with each other, outside of or in addition to work affinity groups, shouldn’t be an issue.
3. How we insert ourselves at work cannot disrupt the “normal” flow of the office.
While we all know that there is comfort in representation for marginalized folks, we also know that our comfort unintentionally disrupts the workplace because it does not benefit everyone.
When White people are not included in a conversation, celebration, or gathering, their feelings of exclusion can lead them to cry out about “reverse racism.” These sentiments of exclusion trickle down into the workplace where Black employees take on the burden of making sure others feel included even though that same respect isn’t always reciprocated.
4. We have embodied the idea of tokenism and cannot let our interactions influence our professional progression.
Now, friends, sometimes we can contribute to our own problems. There are some instances where we, as Black people, prohibit ourselves from engaging with each other because we have been conditioned that there is not enough room for all of us at the table.
Scarcity mindset informs us that there are only so many opportunities for corporate advancement for a person of color. But you know what? If the “table” is full, we have been innovative as a people for centuries and we can build a newer and bigger table for all of us to fit.
Black people deserve to have a space where they can earn a living while being themselves.
It is my hope that as workplaces address issues and practices regarding diversity, equity, and inclusion, employees and managers consider what the unwritten rules are in the office. There are marked benefits to social interaction amongst employees in the workplace: Having friends in the office can increase happiness, decrease stress, and even lead to more employee loyalty to the company where they work. And having more people of color in a work environment leads to a diversity of ideas.
Black people deserve to have a space where they can earn a living while being themselves.
If you are reading this and didn’t identify with this piece, no worries. I hope it leaves you to think about how much more effective your Black employees or co-workers will be, and how much more included they will feel if they knew that there was truly a space for them where they could tend to their own needs as people and professionals without having to reassure their non-Black colleagues.
