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What's A "Good Father" In The Black Community?
There seems to be some discrepancy on this topic. Let's clear it up!
Being a parent is a difficult task for us all.
This is true regardless of gender or whether you are a custodial or non-custodial parent. Nevertheless, most of the responsibilities are placed on the shoulders of women across the board.
In the past, I've been quite critical of Black fathers, particularly, and with good reason. As someone who was raised by a married-single mother, has known plenty of single mothers, and is technically one myself. I've also done enough research and spoken to enough men and women online to determine the collective attitude toward parenting in the Black community.
The bottom line? Women are responsible for most child-rearing and must be grateful for anything a father chooses to do, whether it's big, small, unhelpful, or even detrimental.
As a mother, single or not, you are constantly reminded how many Black children have no fathers in their lives, and therefore, you should just appreciate the fact that the man is trying.
I'm over it.
Going along with this rhetoric is why the bar for Black dads is in hell. Rather than holding them accountable for every child they create, as a community, we often come together to make excuses for the lack of involvement and tell women to try harder to cover the slack.
Fine and dandy.
But how is it that these are the same men asserting themselves as "the most involved fathers" in America?
But before we dive into the ins and outs of the "study" that has Black fathers hollering about parental supremacy, let's get into what brought us here, to begin with.
This Facebook post:
