Stop Victim-Blaming Women of Color
The unhealthy messages we receive about sex are confusing, and often detrimental
It’s the mother’s voice that raises an octave when she asks why her daughter went to that party in the first place. It’s the incredulous tone given by friends when they say, “But couldn’t you have pushed him off?” And it’s the look of accusation in her father’s eyes when he outright says, “This is your fault.” Victim-blaming is the insinuation or explicit message that her experience of trauma was her fault and her fault alone. This is the thing that shatters her to pieces inside. And this is when she struggles to pick up those pieces and put herself back together again.
As a mental health professional for the last decade, I’ve noticed a common thread throughout many Black women survivors. Although their experience of sexual assault is deeply painful, one of the most difficult aspects to reconcile is the trauma of being victim-blamed by family and friends. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), an estimated 21.2% of Black women experience sexual violence in our lifetimes. Although some survivors receive support, the majority experience some level of victim-blame.
Before Black women encounter victim-blaming, we are exposed to unhealthy messages about sex, sexual development…
