Stop Asking Your Black Friends ‘How Are You?’

The answer to that question should be obvious. Instead, ask how you can help.

A woman chants as people protest the grand jury decision in the Breonna Taylor case on September 23, 2020 in Denver, United States. Photo: Michael Ciaglo/Getty Images

As a Black woman, on September 23, 2020, I felt numb — very numb.

I have already dealt with a lot of hurt and disappointment this year, but today I, and the rest of the country, found out that Breonna Taylor did not get full justice. The police officer who murdered her was not found to be at fault in her death. In fact, one of the officers was charged for three felony accounts due to the bullets that entered the other apartments, not for the bullets that entered her body.

Yes, you heard that right. He was charged for the bullets that damaged the building, not for taking away the life of a human being — a Black human being. Reactions to this news are what you should expect. Black people are angry, sad, tired and/or annoyed all at once. So, asking your Black friend “How are you?” is kind of redundant and maybe not the best question to ask during this time.

The reality is that Black people are not okay right now.

The reality is that Black people are not okay right now. In fact, your Black friend is probably in pain and/or grieving. Obviously this statement is a generalization, but overall, most Black…