My Parents Are Married, But My Dad Has a Mistress
It’s complicated
My parents met at a party in New York City during a double date in the early ’70s. The couples switched partners because my mother and father had better chemistry. Less than a year later, they married.
They are technically still married, but have been separated for over two decades. I assumed they loved each other dearly in the beginning of their marriage. Once, I came across one of my mother’s journal pages in which she wrote, “He was fly”; a reference to my dad.
Recently, when I asked my dad about my mother, he said, “I loved her.” He paused then added, “She’s a very nice lady. But in a relationship, you need trust and communication.”
He was gingerly talking about their relationship, perhaps assuming I hadn’t observed and experienced snippets of things that led to their failed marriage.
Outside of family vacations, I don’t recall many tenderhearted moments and loving words between them. They talked, but it was sometimes cordial tinged with frustration. My dad often accused my mother of mismanaging family finances while my mother accused him of cheating. They were right about each other.
When I was a child, certain phone calls were a signal. The phone would ring once. Then the person hung up and called…
