‘I Can Be a Therapist and… Do Porn’

Meet Jet Setting Jasmine, who is rejecting cultural norms through her work in therapy and adult films

Photos courtesy of Jasmine.

JJet Setting Jasmine is all over the place, as her name suggests. Within the past week, she has hosted sold out Steel and Stilettos fitness classes, as well as Kinky Popups in Oakland, San Francisco, Houston, and New York. Charlotte is next on her travel schedule among other places that haven’t been announced yet. The year has only just begun, but her busy life as a sexy entrepreneur is by design.

That design is propelled by all that Jasmine is. But she is “a project chick, first and foremost,” she says. After that, the list is long. The 39-year-old is a multifaceted businesswoman, a mother of three, a clinical mental health therapist, and a gerontologist. She’s also an adult film star who lives with the audacity of Lil’ Kim squatting in the Hardcore poster.

From academia to porn to entrepreneurship, Jasmine is unabashed in all she does because she loves it.

“I believe that I can be a therapist, and I can also do porn. I can do both things. I can be a mom and I can also be a sex educator, and those things do not cause me a fork in the road every day.”

In an age when women are still judged for how they choose to exist, it was important for Jasmine to unlearn the sexist tropes she was taught about sex and womanhood. Deprogramming paved the way for her to professionally pursue her passion for pleasure in ways that tie together all facets of who she is.

“I believe that I can be a therapist, and I can also do porn. I can do both things. I can be a mom and I can also be a sex educator, and those things do not cause me a fork in the road every day,” Jasmine tells ZORA. “I don’t have to decide if I want to be a mother or if I want to travel on the swingers cruise. None of those things are prerequisite for the other, or a requirement in any way shape or form, nor do they exclude me.”

JJasmine, a first-generation American born to a Panamanian father and Filipino mother, grew up in Queens, New York. She currently resides in Tampa, Florida, with King Noire, her romantic and business partner of almost a decade, their one-year-old son, and her two daughters who are 15 and 19. Her children are living a different life from how she was raised. As a child, sex wasn’t discussed in her single mother’s Catholic home. But race is a concept she grasped quickly.

“Race has really always been a passion of mine since I was a child because of growing up with a disconnect from my mother, from our experiences as women, as far as the way the world perceives [us]. My mom looks like a Filipino woman, but every time I stepped outside of my home, I [presented] and grew up as a Black woman, a Black girl,” Jasmine says. “It’s interesting, the aspects that I find presenting themselves even as an adult that have to do with my identity and how Black women are not really given the range.”

Jasmine’s personal journey of exploring her sexuality peaked when she was in her early thirties. She worked a lucrative job at a government agency, developing training and educating around intimacy and caregiving, when she embarked on her own self-described sexual freedom journey in about 2010. Work came first, and then motherhood, but after leaving the trauma of a tumultuous relationship that she’s tight-lipped about, she realized she wanted to explore the new woman she was becoming. That involved continuing her work as a therapist, but also tapping into her sexuality.

She danced in strip clubs periodically, which gave her an opportunity to make money and flirt with men in a controlled environment. Soon after, she started hosting sex toy parties where she educated clients on how to properly use those toys on themselves and others. Though she and King Noire were platonic at the time, Jasmine brought him to the parties to add a man’s perspective and there was a lot going on. The women at the parties enjoyed King Noire’s perspective, but the company Jasmine sold toys for didn’t appreciate his presence. The company ended ties with Jasmine, but her events gained popularity, amassing a fan base that followed her and King Noire when they decided to continue doing kinky events independently. The other issue for Jasmine was her 9-to-5. She was aware that she could lose her high-paying job as a result of her additional work. Her side hustles were legal, but her employer tried to push her out as Jasmine’s events became office fodder when colleagues discovered her events via word of mouth and social media.

But by that point, she had her sights on something more.

Her partnership with King Noire blossomed into a loving open relationship, and led to the creation of several companies. Together, Jasmine and King Noire own the award-winning Royal Fetish Films, which produces adult content and events. They do fetish training where they teach people how to dominate or be submissive, and about BDSM. They conduct workshops centered on various topics like sex-positive parenting, the importance of consent, and how to stay safe in the industry. They are focused on creating safe spaces for people of color to explore their kinks.

“[Jasmine and King] were my first experience with exploring polyamory and submission. They were open and honest, and just have such effective communication and respect for boundaries and everything,” says Star,* a licensed clinical social worker and drug and alcohol counselor, who was a sub and filmed an award-winning scene for Jasmine and King. “All of Jasmine’s multilayers combine well because they’re all transferable skills. While you’re in scenes with people in the BDSM and fetish world — all that stuff from social work of talking about consent and checking in — they even do aftercares too. If you look at their scenes — all that stuff is from our world of social work.”

Jasmine still practices therapy through Blue Pearl Therapy, another company she owns, where she provides virtual services. Her clients vary, but many are in the sex industry and have experienced sexual trauma. Healing sexual trauma is one of Jasmine’s many focuses, but it’s also personal. She was molested as a child. Jasmine is also aware of stereotypes about why people end up in sex work and makes it a point to clear that up.

“I think it’s important to mention that a child is victimized sexually [around] every six to eight minutes, so there are either a lot of people with sexual trauma that do a lot of different things with their lives, or there’s a lot of porn stars. So, I’m going to go with the first, that there are a lot of people who have been sexually assaulted in the entire world, not just one particular industry,” Jasmine says. “That’s important because people do have a misconception that all people in the sex industry have had trauma. I go as far as to say a majority of people in every industry have had some form of childhood trauma. So, it’s very unfair to sex workers, especially sex workers where that isn’t a decision-making factor for them. And it’s also unfair to the accountants who have experienced sexual assault.”

“Her work is important because there are so many stigmas around sex. So many people have so much trauma around sex and she confronts it on every level imaginable.”

Jasmine affirms that her childhood trauma inspires her therapeutic work. She understands the importance of having someone to talk to, how to identify and heal triggers, and how to lead a productive and empowered life. She hopes that others can learn to do the same.

“Her work is important because there are so many stigmas around sex. So many people have so much trauma around sex and she confronts it on every level imaginable,” King Noire says. “Not only can she have a conversation with you on theory and ideas, but she can also show and prove through her life experiences.”

JJasmine’s own on-camera work started from a moment of passion nearly a decade ago. She and King Noire decided to allow their sub to film them having sex. The end result was that they loved the lighting and their chemistry. It was unlike anything they’d seen in the industry.

That experience sparked more moments between them — for public consumption.

“When we were watching it back, it was so natural, and obviously [we had] a natural attraction and chemistry to one another. When I looked at it I was like, ‘This is beautiful,’ not because it’s my sex, but it’s the sex that I don’t see [but] would watch,” Jasmine says. “So, we made this beautiful piece and we made a decision to put it out there for the world to see, and the feedback was exactly the same like, ‘I would watch more porn if this existed,’ so we decided to make it exist, and here we are.”

Jasmine points out that their presence in the adult entertainment industry and ownership of their work are revolutionary acts. There’s a difference in how Black women are treated by their White counterparts in porn. Pay inequities exist, especially for Black women, and movie titles skew in ways that convey negative stereotypes.

Jasmine explains that her various case analyses of porn titles tend to find varying results from the same company when comparing films with White women and Black women. For example, one that featured White women was titled Anal Queens, while the one with Black women was called Hip-Hop Whores. It’s also okay in the porn industry to be exclusionary and hide behind a fetish.

“Our industry is the only one in this country where it’s perfectly okay for a person to say they don’t sleep with Black women or that they only do Black men. You can’t work at Target and say, ‘I only ring up White people,’” she says. “This is a space for people to be very open with what they feel about fetishizing our bodies, fetishizing our sex. That is why there are aspects to even hating our bodies and hating our sex and to a certain extent, I think there can be a level of hate integrated in fetishizing a human.”

She counters negativity in her industry by focusing on the type of passion and inclusion that she wants to see. This is reflected in the content she puts out and the events she hosts with her partner. For Jasmine, Black kink matters, Black sex matters, and Black pleasure matters.

So does autonomy. It’s key.

“I find that being able to make decisions for my body, being able to see myself as a full sexual being, and being able to take control of that narrative around my body is empowering,” Jasmine says. “My sex is not what somebody else is choosing for me. It does defy a lot of the messaging around what women should be doing [but] when you can take control of something that has at one point in time had a control on you, then you are in a better space for it. And that is empowering.”

*Name changed upon request.

Wife. Mom. Jaded Journo. Digital Content Producer. Aerialist. Gryffindor/Ravenclaw. Wanderluster. Author of ‘Bloggers Can’t Be Trusted’ on Amazon.

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