Sex & Love

How the Pandemic Ended Casual Sex

Women are not sacrificing their time — or health — for superficial pairings anymore

Ayesha K. Faines
ZORA
Published in
5 min readAug 20, 2020

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Smiling Black woman sitting on a terrace with her laptop, on a phone call.
Photo: Peter Dressel/Getty Images

Ayesha Faines is ZORA’s newest relationships columnist. You’ll be hearing her musings on the intersection of love and power on a biweekly basis. This column is her debut.

“Before Covid, you could never get people to be open,” my college friend said one night over Zoom. “Men wanted to go to happy hours. They wanted to play rounds of ‘who do you know?’ Now, you’re actually getting to know each other.”

Judging by the looks of the women on my screen, we were all shocked, mainly because she lives in the heart of D.C., a city where single, college-educated women outnumber men 53 to 47 — a city where singleness is a way of life.

But on this particular night, the romantic report was anything but bleak.

As a statuesque, Black, über-educated, thirtysomething professional searching for “the one” in Chocolate City, my friend was practically starring in her own weird, apocalyptic rom-com — and loving every minute. The pandemic had replaced a blur of boozy brunches with scenic bike rides and masked strolls through the park.

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Ayesha K. Faines
ZORA
Writer for

I’m a columnist for Zora 🍯, founder of Women Love Power, talking head & salsera 💃🏾! WomenLovePower.com | IG & Twitter @ayeshakfaines.