‘Girlfriends’ Showed Us What a Toxic Friendship Looks Like

Can we really talk about Joan and Toni?

Arielle Gray
ZORA

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Screenshot of Jill Marie Jones as Toni in “Girlfriends.”
Toni from “Girlfriends.” Photo: CBS

Watching Girlfriends in the early 2000s with my momma are memories I’ll always cherish. Even though I was too young to know what most of the show was about (Joan’s “three-month rule” or Sean’s sex addiction), I knew I enjoyed seeing four Black women going through life together. Even at my young age, I could feel the importance of sisterhood. I could feel the magic that comes with finding your “girlfriends.” I, too, wanted to be successful, beautiful, and Black with a core group of Black friends.

When Netflix announced the release of all eight seasons of Girlfriends, there was a collective elation that spread through Black Twitter and other social media platforms. Black womxn everywhere immediately began streaming Girlfriends when it dropped. It’s our cult classic. I binged season after season, warm from the nostalgia I felt just from hearing the theme song. As a kid, I idolized the friendships between Joan, Lynn, Maya, and Toni because it gave me something to look forward to as an adult. But now as an adult, I can clearly see the threads of toxicity running through their friendships because it was so well-obscured by their cute dinner dates, burgeoning career paths, and fun nights out.

“Is it me or is this kind of…

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