ZORA Check-In

Forgive Yourself as an Act of Self-Love

Morgan Jerkins
ZORA

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Black and white photo of Dolores Huerta against a violet background.
Photo illustration; Image source: Scott Dudelson/Getty Images

“If you haven’t forgiven yourself something, how can you forgive others?” — Dolores Huerta, labor rights activist

I have a confession to make: I am very hard on myself. I suffer from second-hand embarrassment, I have to constantly talk myself into taking breaks, but most of all, I pore over my mistakes unless I can distract myself with work or a TV show. The older and wiser I get, the more I look over my past experiences and wonder, why the hell did I do that? Why didn’t I go right instead of left? Why didn’t I leave that situation sooner?

Are there memories that have you stuck? Are there moments in your life that still make you feel sour in the mouth and sore in the belly? Sometimes we don’t demonstrate self-love if we chastise our former selves, which is counterproductive because those selves were a part of our making. Forgive yourself for what you didn’t know then but you know now. Make sure you have the tools to make better and healthier decisions in the future.

ZORA readers, what do you still have to forgive yourself for in the past? #ZORACheckIn

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Morgan Jerkins
ZORA
Writer for

Morgan Jerkins is the Senior Editor at ZORA and a New York Times bestselling author. Her debut novel, “Caul Baby,” will be published by Harper in April 2021.