The Buddhist Concept That Can Make You a Better Ally
Dear friend: Your body language betrays your true thoughts in these troubled times
We had just come back from a march for immigrant rights, exhausted but exhilarated. She, a German art director, and I, an Indian television producer, had bonded over our shared experiences as permanent residents of the United States. I admired her zeal for social justice issues, especially because, as a non-citizen, I was hesitant about being too visible. “It’s terrifying,” I said, “That as immigrants, we have a target on our backs.” Involuntarily she reared back, as though slapped in the face. “Oh, I’m not an immigrant,” she said, shocked.
We stared at each other for a second. “Right,” I finally said, and we changed the subject. But her body language — how she’d jerked away from me, how her blue eyes had widened in surprise — stayed with me. My friend was much more of an “activist” than I was. Yet her reaction made it clear to me that deep down, she didn’t quite relate to or see herself in the people she fought for. Although she put in the time and effort, I wondered: Could such a person truly be an ally in the fight against racism? And why was she attending immigrant rights rallies anyway?
