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Cyntoia Brown-Long on the 5 Excruciating Days of Her Trial
‘The overwhelming consensus among the world was something must be wrong with me.’
In an excerpt from her forthcoming book Free Cyntoia, Cyntoia Brown-Long recounts her 2006 trial for killing a man who picked her up for sex when she was 16. Public figures like Rihanna drew attention to her case as an example of a minor victimized by sex trafficking and failed by the legal system. She ultimately served 15 years of a life sentence and was released earlier this year. Here, she shares what was running through her head during the five days of her trial.
Standing outside the courtroom, I was dressed in nice pants and a blouse. This was it. After nearly two years of waiting, my trial was about to begin. Acid burned in my stomach and I chewed a Tums Wendy had given me in a futile attempt to put out the fire. I tried not to think about what the next few days would mean for my future. Just get through today, I thought.
I was as ready as I would ever be. Rich and Wendy had trained me to keep my composure no matter who was testifying or what they said. I knew the slightest eyebrow raise could turn the jury against me. I was instructed to keep my mouth shut as long as we were in the courtroom. Rich gave me a notepad and told me to write down any questions or points I wanted him to make.
But nothing could have prepared me for the moment we walked into the courtroom for my first-degree murder trial.
Only Mommy would be worried about making me feel better when she’s sitting at her child’s murder trial.
Within a few hours, the final jury was selected, and we started the trial with our opening arguments. I listened to Rich speak, feeling better as he described me sympathetically to the jury. This is good, I thought.
But when the district attorney (DA) began his argument, I realized I was in for an emotional roller coaster. No, no, no, I thought, looking at the jury anxiously. That ain’t what happened. Please don’t believe a word this man says.
I turned my head toward Mommy to make sure she was okay. I knew it wasn’t easy on her to hear people…
