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Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman Saved Their FriendshipWith Couples Therapy
In their debut book ‘Big Friendship,’ the hosts of ‘Call Your Girlfriend’ explore the joys and challenges of their 11-year bond

Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman, hosts of the popular podcast Call Your Girlfriend, have been friends since 2009. Like a lot of friendships between BFFs, they’ve given each other much-needed pep talks, shared memorable vacations, and navigated uncomfortable conversations. Sow, a writer and cultural commentator, and Friedman, a journalist and media entrepreneur, value Big Friendship, which they define as “a strong, significant bond that transcends life phases, geographical locations, and emotional shifts.” Big Friendship is also the name of their new bestselling debut book, which explores the delights, complexities, and challenges of friendship, and what it takes to keep it going.
ZORA caught up with the long-distance besties to talk about love languages, going to couples therapy, and healing after a friendship ends.
This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
ZORA: After reading Big Friendship, I kept thinking about love languages. What are your friendship love languages?
Ann: One of our love languages is gifts. That’s for sure.
Aminatou: Yeah. I’m a quality of time person, I got to say.
Ann: We have a shared commitment to give gifts. But it’s true, quality time and acts of service. I am a big acts of service person.
What’s the best gift you’ve received from one another?
Aminatou: I can’t even start to tell you how many good gifts Ann has given me. But I will say that recently she made me these napkins that she had sewn herself. It was the perfect gift.
Ann: When I think about my answer to this question, I think about so many instances where Aminatou has noticed a gap in my life and bought me a little something to fill it. When we were working on this book, I was staying in New York and the place I was staying in had a nice bathtub. I was taking all these baths, so Aminatou brought me this really amazing bath oil that I used for the duration of the time I…