Feminism
In ZORA. More on Medium.
It’s okay if your edges aren’t laid.
When I was a small child, I spent every morning on the floor watching cartoons while my momma secured my hair in tight braids wound with hard plastic bobos and fastened with butterfly-shaped barrettes. All of my outfits were perfectly color-coordinated and pressed free of any wrinkles. I was explicitly told not to let anyone touch my hair and was repeatedly implored to stop picking up rocks and stuffing them in my pockets.
Presentability was instilled in me from an early age. All the women in my family know how to dress, and I was taught to take a lot…
‘While some women leave their 30s in protest — kicking and screaming — thankfully, I don’t think that will be me’
Almost every Black person has heard or repeated the saying “Black don’t crack” in a declaration of how good we look throughout the aging process. But what constitutes looking good? Minimal wrinkles, fit bodies, and the absence of grays? Or full booties, softly rounded tummies, and the friendly crinkle of crow’s feet?
As I stare 40 in the eye, contemplating these questions, growing older is not nearly as scary as I thought it would be. A younger me expected to feel beat down by my late thirties or that I would be wearing muumuus and slides. But I’m still as…
How unconscious bias plays a pivotal role in therapy’s effectiveness
Her office was always draped in heavy, dark curtains. The air was musty, perhaps because the emotional support dog frequently napped in the corner.
Where I come from, animals aren’t kept indoors, so the scent of wet dog clinging to the linens was new. The room, however, felt familiar. Maybe because it was filled with antiques, like British West Indian homes in the ’90s which were outfitted with Syrian rugs and Chinese porcelain figurines. Unfamiliar were the European-esque paintings, reminiscent of my therapist’s upbringing. …
Softness in Black girls is both strength and rebellion
I was not Black enough as a kid.
At least, that’s what I was often told by my classmates and, more subtly, by my family.
As soon as I entered middle school, I became obsessed with shoujo manga and anime — the type of Japanese visual media made for teen girls. Magical girls, romance stories, and cute colorful characters were my kryptonite. Every week I was in Borders (I know) spending my allowance on every volume of Tokyo Mew Mew (which was for me what Sailor Moon was for everyone else).
Yet when talking to friends at school, I hid…
Allegations of bullying levied at Markle remind us that our character will be attacked by folks uncomfortable with our existence
I’ll never forget the time a former manager, an older White woman, remarked how I wasn’t my usual “peppy self” and hadn’t been smiling as much. Now mind you, this was shortly after the 2016 presidential election, so there wasn’t exactly much to smile about.
It didn’t take long (16 months from my hire date, to be exact) for me to go from “office pet” to “office threat.” My work exceeded expectations, but my temperament apparently didn’t satisfy my manager’s “perky” criteria. Given the mostly White work environment and the cultural climate of the times, I was maintaining the best…
A child-free life is just as rich and meaningful as anyone else’s
I love babies. Always have. I love their chubby little cheeks, the way their little hands grasp around my fingers, and the bug-eyed, unblinking way they look at you when you make any sort of unexpected sound.
Kids seem to take to me pretty well and pretty easily too. I’m among the eldest of my cousins, with the youngest being eight years old. I also taught elementary students in the earlier stages of my career. Nothing about children mystifies or confuses me. I don’t find them strange or repulsive. Most of the time, they’re pretty funny. Sticky, but funny.
Yet…
I’mma just keep talking about Black women
I would like to take this moment to announce that I will continue waxing poetic about Black women even as Black History Month comes to a close.
As we head into Women’s History Month in March, I thought it would be nice to let everyone know that all of my content will remain more or less the same. As I have remained a woman in Black History Month, I will remain a Black person in Women’s History Month. I also expect to remain queer, for that matter.
In fact, since June is recognized as Pride Month in the U.S., and…
Between the Black female activists in Georgia and Kamala Harris’ vice presidency, we are in good hands
It comes as no surprise that the demographic of women who are most likely to die from pregnancy-related complications, see their sons disproportionately incarcerated, and represent 22% of American women in poverty are the backbone of American democracy. Across history, Black women, who face compounded hardship based both on their race and gender, have used their frustration as motivation to work toward a fair society for themselves — and for everyone else.
When Kamala Harris was elected to the vice presidency alongside Joe Biden, history was made. Never before had a Black person, a person of South Asian descent, or…
Ahead of Lifetime’s biopic on the legendary rap group, we pulled this list together. Dig in.
Black women’s effects on hip-hop dates back to its inception more than 50 years ago. Founding father Kool Herc had help from his sister when he threw his epic block parties. Sylvia Robinson established a viable business model with Sugar Hill Records. Sha-Rock, Sparky D, and Roxanne Shanté were also in the mix, setting examples for future generations of women who wanted to rock the mic. The Sequence was an early example of what a group of rhyme-slanging women could do on a national level.
Our influence on the genre cannot be discussed without the legendary Salt-N-Pepa, who now have…
We don’t have to dim ourselves to get what we want. It’s out there.
When California rapper Saweetie appeared on Instagram Live with her boyfriend, Quavo, and told women that a man isn’t worth dating “if he’s not getting you a Birkin,” it sparked a heated debate about women and their standards. How high is too high? But for me, that brief viral moment called to mind a real virtual movement taking place among Black women who dream of securing the bag, even if not a $100,000 Birkin, by leveling up.
Every day a new guru emerges with trade secrets for Black women who want to learn to be “feminine” in order to attract…
